Deciding to start or grow your family is exciting. However, when month after month, pregnancy doesn’t happen, the conversation around family building can become a difficult one. For men, especially, talking about infertility is often hard, but open and honest communication is key to navigating this journey as a couple. In this article, we’ll share some tips on how to approach conversations about fertility in a way that’s mutually supportive and beneficial.
1. Neither of you is alone
As you navigate this season of life, it’s important to recognize that you’re in this together. While male infertility is much less talked about, research shows that male factor infertility is the cause of 30% of infertility cases with another 20% attributed to both male and female factors. Instead of placing pressure or blame on one partner, approach this as a team and explore your options together. Using phrases like “Let’s explore this together” rather than “You should get checked” helps.
2. Talk about it
Dealing with infertility is deeply personal and often stressful. Talking about it can bring up a range of emotions, from frustration to sadness to hope. You and your partner might be processing things at different paces, so empathy goes a long way. Set the stage for a constructive conversation by choosing a comfortable time and place. Try to avoid discussing fertility during high-stress moments or when emotions are running high. Consider starting with an open-ended question like, “How are you feeling about our journey to conceive?” to encourage dialogue rather than jumping to conclusions based on your assumptions.
3. Empower yourself with knowledge
Fertility is a complex subject and there are many misconceptions about reproductive health. Take the time to read up together as this will help you make more informed decisions along the way. Understanding factors like sperm health, ovulation cycles, lifestyle influences, and treatment options can help you both feel more in control of the process.
4. Approach testing as a couple
For many men, the idea of fertility testing can feel intimidating. However, checking your fertility is imperative to find out why pregnancy is not happening. As a first step, the Yo Sperm Test allows you to assess your sperm motility and quality in the privacy of your home, making it an easy and affordable way to learn more about your reproductive health. Review your results together and discuss the next steps as a team. Fertility is a shared journey, not something one partner has to face alone.
5. Plan the next steps together
Optimizing fertility often requires lifestyle changes, such as improving diet, exercising, reducing stress, and limiting alcohol or smoking. Instead of focusing on one person’s habits, see what you can do together and make the process more collaborative.
If initial testing or lifestyle changes aren’t enough, discuss the next steps. This might include further medical evaluations and seeking advice from a fertility specialist. Approach these decisions together and step-by-step, keeping in mind each other’s comfort levels, emotions, and family-building goals.
6. Communicate throughout
You’re building a family together - the journey to get there is a joint one. Talk about your feelings, fears, and aspirations; educate yourself, and take proactive steps together, be they lifestyle modifications or testing. Fertility goes beyond the medical aspect. It’s an emotional journey best navigated as a team. Supporting each other helps you strengthen your relationship and keeps you connected throughout the process.